It has been said,
"every cloud has a silver lining.” It is difficult to imagine how having a
diagnosis of cancer could have a bright side.
But this is what cancer
has taught and/or reinforced in me, so that I can continue to live a meaningful
life:
1. My
life as I know it will never be the same. Even if I am one of the lucky ones, who finds myself in remission or
cured, the perpetual cloud over my head may creep back into my life wondering
if cancer will return. I am only human.
2. Live
one day at a time. I wake up each
morning and I shout to myself, “Thank you God for this beautiful day!” It is
important that I live in the here and now, because that allows me to live each
moment, smell each flower, kiss the cheeks of my grandchildren, hug each
friend, stroke my husband’s face, and find joy in just being. There is
something so joyful about JUST BEING.
3. Thoughts
lead to actions. The cancer journey
and treatments often cause apprehensive or fearful thoughts to enter my mind. I
have to give the thoughts that enter my head a facelift. I yell, “STOP!” in my
head. “I am going to be okay.” I have to avoid getting stuck in a
self-fulfilling prophecy by acknowledging the apprehension, but doing the
treatment or procedure anyway.
4. Priorities
may change. God, people, and relationships
are my priorities. You learn who is and is not important in your life. Money is
important for food, shelter, and basic necessities. Anything extra is icing on
the cake. It is a means to an end. It
gives you freedom to travel, to explore your hobbies, to make your society
better. You can’t take it with you. And all that “stuff” you have… You can’t
take that with you either.
5. Do
what brings you joy. Art, writing, fishing,
and healthy relationships give me joy.
6. You
suddenly see the big picture of your life. Yes, it is like a fast-forward film. Do you have regrets? Did you live
your life with passion, gratitude and love? Would you rearrange your life? What
would you change? Have you put off doing something because you thought you had
so much time to do it later? What is holding you back from living the life you
deserve?
7. We
need each other. As long as I know I
am not alone in my journey, I can endure. That means that my medical team, my
friends, my family, my online community, my church group, and my cancer support
group are integral components of my living a meaningful life.
8. Complementary
treatments (reflexology,
acupuncture, myofacial release, meditation, counseling, etc.) have helped me
significantly manage chronic stress and coping strategies, and improve the
quality of my life. Chronic stress can affect an already compromised immune
system.
9. And most importantly, I have learned to live my life
with gratitude
and love.
P.S.: The future of cancer care
Cancer care should not end
when you are pronounced to be in remission or sent home after a series of
radiation treatments. When someone undergoes orthopedic surgery or has a heart
attack, there is a recognized rehab system in place to help with recovery for
those survivors of injuries and serious illnesses. Oncologists do not usually
offer cancer treatment aftercare services. Standard cancer treatments are
extremely toxic and often cause physical and mental problems that hinder normal
daily lives, such as fatigue, pain, cognitive impairment, sleep difficulties,
anxiety and depression. The diagnosis of cancer alone can prompt these
difficulties.
Investing in the
rehabilitation of cancer patients may actually help them survive longer and
enjoy a better quality of life. My hematologist/oncologist Dr. Robin Obenchain in
Tempe, Arizona embraces the concept of a follow-up cancer care plan in her
medical practice. She offers the services of a palliative care nurse Bonnie
Morgan. Addressing the spiritual, mental, physical, and emotional health of the
cancer patient in follow-up care honors the patient with dignity. Thank you,
Dr. Robin.
